Deep State District Attorney Hanged After Sleep-Talking Secrets

An ethically compromised Deep Stater was hanged at Guantanamo Bay Wednesday morning—even though he was convicted of treason on March 15 and scheduled to hang on March 26.

As reported, a tribunal recommended that the U.S. Attorney for the District of Columbia, Matthew Graves, receive the maximum allowable punishment—a rope necklace—for illegally and unconstitutionally imposing severe prison sentences on innocent patriots who had peacefully visited the Capitol on J6.

A JAG source told RRN that Admiral Crandall had a valid and compelling reason for postponing Graves’ execution: the diabolical district attorney had inexplicably developed a case of somniloquy, or sleep talking, a benign form of parasomnia that typically needs no medical intervention.

The night after Graves’ trial, an alert Camp Delta MP heard Graves mumbling rowdily in his sleep. The longer Graves spoke, the more precise his words became—and the MP realized that he was suddenly uttering proper nouns, the names of J6ers he had sentenced to periods of incarceration. Amid Graves’ nocturnal ramblings came a non sequitur, the phrase “Rura Penthe,” a fictional subterranean penal planetoid in Star Trek lore.

Rather than dismiss Graves’ slumberous ravings, the MP jotted down on a notepad what he heard and later informed his watch commander, who gave the notes to Adm. Crandall.

“Sure, Graves could’ve just been a Trekkie, but the admiral thought there was more to it because the Deep State uses a lot of code,” our source said.

Two things vexed Admiral Crandall: Graves’ utterance of Matthew Bradford, a Marine Corps Captain who inexplicably vanished off the face of the Earth shortly after supporting President Trump at the Capitol on J6, and his mentioning of the Klingon internment camp.

It has been JAG’s contention that the Deep State’s lawless dragnet caught guiltless patriots, military and civilian, who never saw the inside of a courtroom, a supposition that proved true in March 2023 when Special Forces rescued six Marines from a covert Deep State prison on Long Island, New York. Admiral Crandall suspected Rura Penthe was code for another secret Deep State penitentiary.

The morning after Graves unwittingly blabbed, MPs pulled him from his cell under the pretext of a contraband search and discreetly installed miniature microphones to eavesdrop on his torpid talking.

Over the next few nights, Graves was singularly focused on President Trump. “I hate you, Trump.” “Trump, I’ll get you and your family.” “F*** Trump. F*** MAGA.” Ad nauseum.

His next meaningful phrases escaped his lips on April 3. Between sleepily trashing MAGA and Republican congresspeople for whom he held disdain, Graves’ somniloquisms included the sentence, “Send Trump to Rura Penthe” and the word “Adak”, an Aleutian Island and abandoned military base lost to time, 1,200 miles from Anchorage.

Admiral Crandall connected the dots, as the saying goes, and relayed Graves’ words to General Eric M. Smith and the White Hat council. Four days later, Special Forces freed 14 civilians and 12 military J6ers from imprisonment on Adak Island. Real Raw News will publish an account of the operation on Monday.

Admiral Crandall eavesdropped on Graves for two more weeks before deciding he had no more helpful information to share.

On Wednesday, Graves was told it was time for him to hang.

As he stood atop the gallows, Graves told Admiral Crandall, “Hang me, and my secrets die with me.”

“You don’t know it, but you’ve already given us what we needed to know, detainee Graves. And if there’s more, we’ll get it from someone else. I bid you farewell,” the admiral replied.

Graves was pronounced dead at 11:34 a.m., April 17, 2024.

Edit: This story orginally said that Delta/Rangers freed prisioners on Adak Island. It was actually Special Forces. The story has been corrected to reflect this.